Five Sentence Fiction-“Clutch”: Hope For Nothing

Needle used for Lumbar Puncture

The screams travel out of the room, reverberate through the hall, and slice my soul with the sharpness of a thousand razor-blades. I clutch my little boy as the needle punctures his spine, projecting calm even though I want to scream along with him.

“Done,” the doctor says.

He whimpers, and I stroke his hair, kissing away tears while cooing, “Ssshhh, it’s all over now, baby.” He calms down, but my mind churns as I hope he suffered for nothing.


Lillie McFerrin Writes

For Lillie McFerrin’s Five Sentence Fiction challenge. The word this week: Clutch


13 thoughts on “Five Sentence Fiction-“Clutch”: Hope For Nothing

  1. Wow…I’m still shaking…this was very well written.

  2. Oh this was good…really good !

  3. Oh my! This reminds me of when our younger son (then 4) had to have a spinal tap to test for bacterial meningitis. Only one of us could be in the room… I took a step back and nudged my husband forward. No way could I keep it together through that!

  4. Very food, with lots of emotion, and leaving something for the reader explore in their own mind as the story leads into another part (what do they find from the test).

  5. Very moving. It’s so hard to see your children in pain!

  6. Reminds me of a similar scene in ‘The Exorcist’. Chilling.

  7. You’ve captured that awful moment of helplessness in that awful situation of your child in pain in such a vivid manner. Great writing.

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